The winter holidays can be a fantastic opportunity to enjoy being with family and friends. But they can also be stressful and challenging for people with eating disorders. If you or someone you love is navigating the holidays while struggling with an eating disorder, it is crucial to know how to be supportive.
By: A BALANCE team member
Here are five tips for being there for your loved one during the holidays that will allow them to be recovery-aligned:
Provide a Space Free From Diet Talk
The holidays are filled with diet talk (both on social media and in real life), including unhelpful New Year’s resolutions about exercise, eating, and weight loss. When you’re with your loved one, talk about other things. Whether it’s music, pets, school or work, current hobbies, or favorite shows or movies from this past year, connect over things that have nothing to do with food and body.
Avoid Commenting on Your Loved One’s Eating. Try to Be Neutral about Food
Even when well-intentioned comments about what your loved one eats can make them feel judged and anxious, commenting on food or fullness can cause anxiety for someone with an eating disorder. Instead, be neutral about food and how much you and others have eaten. For example, avoid categorizing food as “good” or “bad” or remarking on how full you feel. This approach can go a long way toward helping someone with an eating disorder feel more comfortable.
Don’t Comment on Bodies or Changes in Weight
In general, it’s a good practice not to comment on people’s bodies or changes in their weight, no matter if it’s in a positive or negative light. This is especially relevant during the holidays when family members and friends often get together after not seeing each other for some time. It’s better to avoid remarking on any physical changes you notice or even saying more general things, like “you look so great.” Stick to describing how you feel about your loved one instead, like “I’m excited to spend time with you.”
Schedule Non-Food or Movement-Related Activities
Spend time with your loved one doing things not centered on eating or movement. For example, you could watch a movie, make decorations, play a game, or catch up and spend time together. Doing things unrelated to food and movement together can help remind your loved one that there is life beyond their food and body distress and that you are there with them.
Remind the Person How Much You Care About Them
Make sure they know that you love and care about them by asking how they have been doing or feeling—being supportive means showing up for them with compassion and without judgment. If you see they are struggling, you can offer a hug or ask what kind of support would be most helpful.
Remember, you can’t change your loved one’s behavior or experience. They are on a journey that often includes setbacks. The only thing you can do is support them by being caring and thoughtful.
It is also important to remember that you are not alone in supporting your loved one. Support can come from friends, family, and a treatment team. If you are interested in giving or getting more support for your loved one during the holidays, check out BALANCE’s exclusive Winter Program. This 12-day intensive program will help jumpstart recovery while fitting conveniently into a winter break schedule. Connect with our Admissions team to learn more.
Our admissions team would be happy to answer any questions you may have about our programs and services. Book a free consultation call with our admissions team below, or read more about our philosophy here.
Looking for eating disorder treatment programs or services in the New York City area? Learn more about our options at BALANCE eating disorder treatment center™ here or contact us here.
