supporting a Loved One With An Eating Disorder
Eating disorders are serious mental illnesses that affect more than just the individual in recovery. Friends, family members, partners, and peers play an important role in identifying worrying symptoms and encouraging loved ones with disordered eating behaviors to seek help. Having a strong support system is essential for a successful recovery.
Recovering from an eating disorder requires treatment with the goal of maintaining a healthy weight and developing a stronger relationship with food, exercise, and body image. Having a treatment team, which is comprised of a therapist, psychiatrist, nutritionist, and dietitian is a necessary part of recovery. It is equally important for individuals with eating disorders to have a support system outside of therapy, which could include trusted friends, family members, teachers, or peers. Those in a support system often recognize changes in their loved ones’ behavior, mood, and eating habits that the individual with the eating disorder may not recognize or even deny. People entrusted in a support system have the responsibility of educating themselves on the eating disorder in question, otherwise, they may not know how to identify problematic behaviors and express their concerns. They also may not understand that eating disorders are not about losing weight, but are the result of a complex combination of risk factors. Because individuals struggling with an eating disorder spend a majority of their time with those in their support system, these are often the people who can encourage their loved one to reach out for help and seek treatment.
Ways To Show Support To Someone Struggling
There are many ways a support system can aid someone dealing with an eating disorder through conversation, during meals, and in difficult situations. One of the best ways to be there for someone is to learn about their eating disorder, be patient, available, and provide reassurance that you are there to help. However, it is important to understand that the individual struggling with an eating disorder has to have a desire to recover. Choose an appropriate time and place to share and discuss any worrisome observations and concerns. According to the National Association of Anorexia Nervosa and Associated Disorders, people should talk openly and honestly about their concerns, while making a conscious effort to listen and learn from each other’s experiences. Voicing one’s worries by using “I” statements is important to avoid sounding accusatory. It is crucial to be firm while trying to avoid using stigmatizing language regarding eating disorders and encouraging the affected person to seek help.
What Not To Do When Someone Is Struggling
Although having a support system can be beneficial to someone working through their eating disorder, in certain circumstances, words and actions can cause more harm than good. As stated by Help Guide, people should not shame, blame, or criticize anyone for their appearance or weight. These comments, whether positive or negative, can make the individual’s body image worse. As a result, those struggling may tend to believe that their worth is based on their physical attributes rather than their personality and character traits. People should refrain from providing the individual with “easy solutions” or tips, such as telling them to just accept their body, to simply stop engaging in disordered behaviors, or urging them to “just eat”. Statements such as these are not helpful and can make those with an eating disorder feel that their eating disorder is not valid. Trusted individuals in a support system should never say that their loved one does not look sick enough to have an eating disorder, critique foods, talk numbers, refer to foods as “good” or “bad”, make someone feel bad about eating, ask for diet advice, commend their self-control, or discuss food during meals. These can be sensitive and triggering topics for those in recovery.
Treating a mental health disorder can be overwhelming for those in recovery. Although family and friends should be encouraging, supportive, and sensitive, they should not pressure or demand that someone seek help. Treatment will not be as effective if they feel pressured or forced into recovery.
Rather, the best way to show support is by refraining from making comments about body size, listening without judgment, and simply being present. Those struggling should be reminded of their qualities which make them unique, without mentioning weight or food. It is up to the individual struggling to seek help, but it can make a significant difference to have a group of understanding, empathetic, and compassionate people to help them through the ups and downs of recovery.
BALANCE eating disorder treatment center™, located in New York City, offers free consultation calls to help you explore next steps. We provide in-person programming seven days a week and are in-network with UnitedHealthcare (UHC), Cigna, and Oscar, with Aetna coverage coming soon. Support is available, and recovery is possible. Schedule a free consultation call with our admissions team here and stay connected with BALANCE on Instagram here.
This post was written by BALANCE Social Media Coordinator, Amanda Nussbaum (she/her).
Amanda is a recent graduate of Ramapo College, where she majored in Business Administration with a concentration in Marketing. She enjoys being creative, writing, and editing videos, and is passionate about health, wellness, and lifestyle. In the future, Amanda hopes to work in the marketing or communications department of an organization that focuses on teenagers and young adults, and their health and self-confidence. She enjoys contributing to the BALANCE blog!
