Q&A with Eating Disorder Survivor and Author, Ananda de Jager
Ananda de Jager is the author of Poems of Recovery, a collection of poetry that provides an intimate and honest look at her eating disorder recovery. Ananda openly shares her thoughts and feelings during the process of healing her relationship with herself and food. With her vulnerability, she hopes to give readers the strength and support to help them in their own journey of healing.
In this Q&A, Ananda shares the healing power of writing, sharing, and reading poetry, particularly during the recovery process.
Who are you?
Hello! My name is Ananda, a 26-year-old Dutchie currently living in Brussels. I have an amazing job and on the side I enjoy reading, writing, working out, discovering new coffee places and challenging myself. A few years ago, I lost my period, which made me realize that my eating disorder had taken a different turn (I never saw restricting as a problem until my body shut down necessary processes), and it took me a while to choose recovery. But I am so thankful I did!
What is your book about?
My book documents me in the process of recovery. It is a collection of poems written during a time where I was looking, longing to find who I was and what was behind my eating disorder. Who was I without? It was all I had ever known. I was hoping that by sharing my experiences, others would be inspired too and choose recovery. To show them they are not alone, that healing is possible. The poems are about discovering life in general, the questions that came up during the process, me finding balance and looking honestly at myself.
What inspired you to recover from your eating disorder?
I would love to say there was one magical moment, but it was more me not wanting to live my life restricting and being scared of food anymore. Not going out to see friends because I wanted to stick to my food schedule, and also, I had lost my period — what if one day I wanted kids? I would never ever want my daughter to go through the same thing. I wanted to heal my body, and see what else there was to life. Who was I without an eating disorder? What would I find? I used my eating as a coping mechanism, as a form of control, and I wanted to let that go. It was of course scary to face all my emotions that I was hiding so much from, but in the end, it was so worth it. I am so very glad I did it. I saw other people had recovered too, and I thought: why would that not be me? Why not? I had always known the eating disorder, why not try something else?
What do you hope others get from your book?
I hope they find the strength to look within and to take the next step. To continue going, to choose life, to see that recovery is possible and that there is strength in vulnerability. While recovery might be something you have to do yourself, you do not have to do it alone. By sharing my thoughts, processes, and emotions, I hope people see that they are not alone in the questions and fears. People are always scared to be a burden to others — I was too — but your real friends will stay. Everyone is scared of something, you are not alone.
If there is one thing you wish others knew about recovery, what would it be?
IT IS WORTH IT! Easier said than done of course, but you have to go through the mud, through your emotions, face your fears, look at your patterns, and then one day you find yourself eating risotto with your parents or dancing around the street and you realize you have never done that before and suddenly you think — I am alive again. I am feeling again. And I wish everyone knew it is possible to get there. ️
Photo by Nicholas Fotiadis
Meet Ananda
Ananda de Jager was born in Goes, the Netherlands. After publishing her first book in 2020, Poems of Recovery - A young girl’s path to recovering from an eating disorder and amenorrhea, she quickly became a mental health advocate, promoting the power of vulnerability during events, workshops, and online.
Ananda now lives in Brussels, Belgium, where she wrote her first book.
Connect with Ananda: Instagram, anandadejager.com, & Amazon